Bari Haken

Browsing nighttime /a/ before going to sleep, I came across this:

At first I expected Bari Haken to be just another otaku manga but I was wrong.

Mitarashi Dango is a closet otaku that just started high school. Throughout middle school, his presence was non-existent and he ate lunch by himself it the bathroom. He decided to attend his particular high school in an attempt to change his life around and live out his visual novel fantasies. However, during one of the first days of school he is told by the leader of a bunch of punks to go buy an adult magazine called Bisho Bisho Idol. He mistakes this as “Bishoujo Figure” and brings a figure of his favorite 2D girl. The boss gets mad and breaks the figure and in a fit of RAGE Dango beats him senseless. Thus he becomes GAR OTAKU; Akiba Boy pretending to be a gang leader and succeeding.

It has been a while since I laughed this hard. With witty dialogue such as this, it is no wonder why I couldn’t stop:

• Blind me with the power of your manly essence
• Rei-tan’s turned into a fusion mecha
• I can only romance 2d girls
• And who the hell thought of this brilliant idea. If I find that son of a…I’ll expose that guy on my blog!!
• 2D girls unlike 3D ones, are awesome and kind and don’t stab you in the back
• I wonder…if someday I’ll have a girl that I can hold just like this [body pillow]…

There are only 2 chapters translated so far and you can get them here. This is the perfect wish-fulfillment read for any ronery otaku. Take advice from the anon who said, “It’s like a revelation. Any anon who carries around a figure of his most beloved 2-d girl is endowed in harrowing situations with the strength of 100 men! Incredible!”